Saturday, May 19, 2012


I can not even believe that I'm getting ready to type this.  I've yet to wrap my mind around this heartbreaking news and as much as I've willed it to be a big nightmare, it isn't.

A few days ago, I was asking for prayers for my nephew.  We knew he was sick, but had no clue what we were looking at.  On Thursday (5/17), Jake got put to sleep to have a biopsy done on his lymph nodes as well as have bone marrow drawn for testing.  He did great with all of that and after my sister and brother-in-law spoke with the surgeon, it was determined that Jake had lymphoma.  We were crushed, but at the same time thankful to finally know what was going on.  Kelley and Shanon were prepared to do whatever it took to get Jake better and the plan for treatment was put in full force.  The full pathology report was due back until the next day (Friday, 5/18), but the oncologist was pretty sure it was B-cell lymphoma.  It was extremely hard to swallow that, but everybody was ready to fight with Jake.

Fast forward to Friday morning (5/18).  I pick up my grandparents and we head to the hospital to visit Jake.  It was going to be their first time seeing Jake, so I tried to prepare them for what they were about to see.  Jake didn't look like himself and he wasn't saying much of anything to anyone.  We get to the hospital and get up to Jake's room.  Shanon stops me before I walk in and asks if Kelley had told me the news.  I told him no, so he filled me in.  The oncologist was wrong.  Jake doesn't have B-cell lymphomas, but instead has T-cell leukemia. I felt my heart sink.  He said that Jake was looking at 3 years of treatment, with the first 6 months being the toughest and most aggressive.  I was speechless.  Still am actually.

Shortly after we got to the hospital, the surgeon was ready for Jake back to the OR.  He was to have a spinal tap and receive his first dose of chemo right into his spinal fluid.  It's my understanding that the the brain is usually where this type of cancer goes IF it were to go into remission and then come back so the doctors want to prevent that from happening if possible.  The spinal tap would allow the chemo to pass through the blood-brain barrier and do what it needed to do to protect the brain.  Jake will also have to go through radiation, but I don't really know the time frame for that.  It will also be directed towards his brain - again for preventative measures.

All of this has been so much to comprehend.  We were so hopeful that Jake just had a terrible infection and that he would get some good drugs and be home by the weekend.  I knew that when we walked onto the oncology floor on Tuesday that it wasn't good.  Jake knows what is going on and he says he understands, but there's no way he can.  He's just a child - cancer isn't meant to be understood by children (or anyone for that matter!).  One thing is for sure - Jake is one strong little boy.  He hasn't complained the first time during all of this and he probably never will.

My sister sent me a text this evening saying that Jake was doing and looking so much better than he had earlier in the day.  She said he was up playing his video games.  That alone is enough to be so thankful for - especially considering how swollen and sick he looked yesterday.

Please continue praying for my sweet buddy.  He is so very special to me and will probably never know how much he really does mean to me.



brigette said...

Im so sorry ashley!!! I am praying for your sweet nephew!!! Prayers sent to all of u in this hard, hard time!! So not fair!

Kelly said...

Oh, Ashley, I'm so sorry. I will be thinking of your sweet family and sending love and hugs.

Tracie said...

Lots of prayers and loves sent your families way. Such a hard thing seeinig family go through something like that.

Tesha said...

Saying a prayer Ashley that is heartbreaking news. I am so very sorry.

Trennia said...

Saying prayers...I am so sorry to hear this...(((hugs)))

Ashley said...

I am so, so sorry. This is just horrible news and something that is not fair for a child to endure. Thinking of you and your family ((hugs))

Shannon said...

Ashley, My son and I will add Jake to our "prayer box" we have in our homeschool room. I'm so very sorry. May the Lord be glorified in all of this, and I pray for peace that surpasses understanding (and of course, healing and comfort for Jake).

Philippians 4:7

TerinAleah said...

Ashley, I am crying like crazy!! Your family is definitely in my thoughts & prayers! I'm SO sick of Cancer affecting people I know! :( And that's the reason we walked in Relay for Life last night! <3